autopilot off

so, i've come to the conclusion that a majority of my life has been spent on autopilot; i've just sort of gone thru the motions alot of times. i feel like, idk, like i didnt want to stay inside the lines but i was too scared to go outside the lines, so i just sort of tightroped my thru life. conclusion: i want to DO something. something i'd never dream of doing, something adventurous and spontaneous and crazy. something that, after it happens, people will look at it and say "that was so unlike jamie, she was such a good girl" my latest (but pathetically feeble) attempt at turning of the omnipresent autopilot fell on the shoulders of my hair. i sacrificed it...about 5-6 inches of it. (i was only an inch away from being able to give to locks-4-love) and then i dyed it black. ever so rebellious. dont get my wrong, i love my hair - but it didnt satisfy my desire for change the way i had hoped it would. maybe i'm just destined to coast safely thru life...